~Saturday, Sep25,04~ My 1st Diary ^_^

Here I am~ This is my first writings using Blogger...there r thoughts in my mind da I do wanna drop down, lots n lots of things happening these days and it gets to me deeply...

It's almost my 4th year in Hong Kong...I'd remember I came back from Toronto wz my b/f EC in the year of 2000, Oct12, it's da day of Mid-Autum Festival, one of my favourite Chinese traditional events (Cuz I am kinda addited to MOONCAKES, especially the kind wz double yolks n white lotus seed paste one, yummy ^_^)...him n I had been together for 5 years (ever since we were in toronto)...Often times, I do regret coming back to HK wz him, because...everything chngd after we came back...his attitudes to work, to his family...and...to ME especially~ I always thought that he's my so called "Mr Right", he used to be caring and loving, he even said he'll be marrying me...actually, my fairy tales vanished after I went to Toronto wz my parents during May, 2004...he had an affair...

Now, my life had been chngd...I used to be a gal who always stayed home, cooking, cleanings, watching tv (Just like a "C-Lai") , a gal who'll wait for his b/f to come home and cook for him...going out where ever he likes and be there wz him all da times...I never thought that this is what he called "pressures" !! Am I really giving him lots of pressures just to be there wz him all the times??? Am i giving him hard times by not going out and stayed home?? He's the one who requested me not to go out ta often, and be there whenever he needed me...it turns out that this is a kinda pressures n not giving him enough of "Freedom / "Space"...~~ Emmm, Love is somehow complicated to understand....n now...its abt time for me to leave...I dun wanna spend another 5 yrs wz a guy n ended up being alone by myself again...it hurts...

I am just a simple minded person, just wanna be happy and be a house-wife (one of my childhood dreams) ...hoping to find a guy who'll love me eternally....haaahah, silly thoughts...will that really happen in da future?? I really dun have a clue, but...I still believe my Mr Right will appears shortly...